Stone vs. iPhone
---------------------------- End-------------------------
WOMEN = GEOGRAPHY
Between the ages of 20 - 30 a woman is like America.
Fully discovered and scientifically perfect.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India & Japan.
Very hot, wise and beautiful !!!!!!!!!
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France.
She is half destroyed after the war but still desirable.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Germany.
She lost the war but not the hope.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia.
Very wide, very quiet but nobody goes there.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England.
With a glorious past but no future.
After 70, they become Siberia.
Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.
Between the ages of 20 - 30 a woman is like America.
Fully discovered and scientifically perfect.
Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India & Japan.
Very hot, wise and beautiful !!!!!!!!!
Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France.
She is half destroyed after the war but still desirable.
Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Germany.
She lost the war but not the hope.
Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia.
Very wide, very quiet but nobody goes there.
Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England.
With a glorious past but no future.
After 70, they become Siberia.
Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.
---------------------------- End-------------------------
The Cruelest Form of Eye Tests for Men
---------------------------- End-------------------------
What is Marketting?
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. "Marry me!"
- That's Direct Marketing... "
--------------------------------------------------------
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. "Marry him."
-That's Advertising. .."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and get her telephone number.
The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. "Marry me
- That's Telemarketing. .."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl.
You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car)"Marry Me?"
- That's Public Relations... "
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl.
She walks up to you and says:"You are very rich! "Can you marry ! me?"
- That's Brand Recognition. .."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!"
She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
- "That's Customer Feedback..."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!"
And she introduces you to her husband.
- "That's demand and supply gap..."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him
- "That's competition eating into your market share..."
--------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives.
- "That's restriction for entering new markets..."
---------------------------- End-------------------------
---------------------------- End-------------------------
HR Dept. - Software Company
When a Software company wanted to hire some parrots, they called in their HR Head, and requested for some profiles which they could shortlist. The next day he went to the pet shop and saw three identical parrots in a cage. He asked the clerk, "how much for the parrot on the right?
The owner said it was $2500.00 "$2500.00", the man said. "Well what does he do? "He knows how to use all of the functions of Microsoft Office 2007, responds the clerk. "He can do all of your spreadsheets and type all of your letters. Capable of taking the load of month end pressure, will not take any leaves."
The man then asked what the second parrot cost.
The clerk replied, $5000.00, but he not only knows Office 2007,
but is an expert computer programmer.
Finally, the man inquired about the cost of the last parrot. The clerk replied, "$10,000.00" Curious as to how a bird can cost $10,000.00, the man asked what this bird's specialty was. The clerk replies, "Well to be honest I haven't seen him do anything. But the other two call him "Project - Manager"!!
---------------------------- End-------------------------
No comments:
Post a Comment